I have discovered this movement afoot to go for a "buy nothing Christmas", a movement which is (in my opinion) a fabulous thing for the over-consuming western world. Basically; you don't buy junk for me and I won't buy junk for you....or anyone else, and by the way every one's off the hook - don't buy me anything. After reading more about the idea I found myself highly motivated to participate. Having two young daughters has altered the level of my participation and somewhat limited it. I shall elect to make as many gifts as I can to satisfy my own need for giving to those around me . But also, Christmas is the perfect opportunity for us to provide those developmentally appropriate books, toys and needed clothes for the girls, so I think it won't be so much "buy nothing," but more "give well."
My partner's family (and to some degree my own family of origin) are very proficient at celebrating the spirit of Christmas, and generally focus on the non- commercial aspects. There is giving of gifts, but not so much focus on the getting of gifts. There are always handmade and well thought out gifts, eco-gifts etc., and the level of craftsmanship among the members gets higher every year. More significant than gifting, however, are other means for celebrating the season, most of which are also more significant to the children, even young ones. As such, I offer my ideas for celebration (and those I have observed) without the need for manic buying......
1. Sing, sing, and sing some more!
Christmas carols can get really tedious when you are feeling bah-humbugish at the mall, but seem to change in quality completely when a family or group of friends (or both!) gets together around a piano (or not) and just belts it out together. There have been recent studies that indicate that singing in choirs or groups can positively effect your health. Sing while you cook, sing while you drive, sing while you walk, sing to your children at bedtime. Sing all together after dinner. Try caroling just up and down your street, or to homes of friends or family members. Young children especially can really latch on to singing as a tradition, they often want to sing the same songs again and again - so select carefully. We have gone through piles and piles of songs in books and online to pick out ones we know and/or like so that we can learn all the verses and have all the words handy. We have also selected based on our values (neither of us would be classified as a religious Christian), and by what we feel is appropriate for our young ones, and finally - we picked the ones that are the most fun to sing!
2. Make things.
There are zillions of things that are simple or easy to make at holiday time. Many things young children can also make, or at least participate in the making of. Most things to make fall into the categories of decorations or gifts (food comes later on in the list). Decorations we have made include but aren't limited to: popcorn strings, paper chains, felt and embroidery thread ornaments, play dough ornaments, clothes peg angels, wool fleece angels, pipe cleaner abstractions, origami cranes, stars etc., paper snowflakes, wreaths, and sprigs of greenery. Gifts we have made include, but aren't limited to: marmalade and other jams, beeswax drip, mold (kitchen silicon works amazingly well), and sheet candles, calendula and other salves and balms, simple beaded necklaces and bracelets (think of a four year old with a darning needle and large wood beads on elastic string), clay candle holders, knitted items (hats, mitts etc. - scarves take too long for me), sewn items, simple wood toys and equipment (child's balance beam), paintings, drawings, sculptures and other artworks, wool felt toy animals, and glitter-glued-on-everything ornaments (pine cones and popsicle sticks particularly). Another thing to consider is that carefully mending something for someone close to you can also be a wonderful gift - that irreplaceable doll needing a new body or the favorite sweater needing new elbows.
If you have the time available, organizing or even just attending a knitting circle, crafting circle or gift making circle can be a great way to enjoy each other's company, learn something new, and get something done all at the same time. I won't try to give you a link for every project, but anything you have an interest in, please do ask me about. I will, however, direct you to The Christmas Craft Book by Tomas Berger which offers instructions for many of these projects and might be available at your library. All of them you can search for online.
3. Bring light in (or out).
One of the traditions we have begun is to celebrate the winter solstice, the darkest day of the year and also the coming of the light. What we do is this; we each put together a makeshift boat (origami boat, driftwood, tree bark, a sturdy leaf, leftover lumber, cardboard and tinfoil) that carries a tea light candle (and sometimes protects it from going out) without sinking - test in your sink. We then make our way to a local waterway (a pond, lake, river, stream, etc.- beaches are often too breezy) after it is dark, and float them for a little while. We haven't done it yet, but it might be nice to sing as well. One environmental note: be sure to design things in such a way that no waste or garbage is left at the site. Now, it has just occurred to me that many people don't enjoy the same mild weather that we do on the west coast, so I am not sure what you might do if you were only able to encounter frozen waterways.....perhaps make a little sled for the light instead of a boat and walk through a park or even on a thoroughly frozen lake with it trailing behind.
Another (warmer) way to celebrate the coming of the light is by bringing light indoors. Make sure you use all appropriate caution with flames, and that children always have an adult supervising. One thing to do inside could be having a fire and hot chocolate or tea - if you have access to a fireplace or wood stove. And again, another great time to sing together. Yet another way to celbrate the coming of the light is by lighting a tea light candle (in a candle holder, and well away from anything flammable such as Christmas trees or curtains) in each window of your home that has a sill. Make sure you put them all out again before you leave the house or go to bed. There is also the regular putting up of Christmas lights inside and outside, although check out the new LED ones; they use far less energy and your local electrical provider may even rebate some or all of the cost difference. Make snow or ice lanterns for candles if you have such weather cooperating with you. You can also make lanterns for inside, but again - remember to be safe with fire!
4. Eat, drink and be merry!
Food and drink are important parts of most holidays and celebrations; Christmas is no different. Every year, I like to get together with other mothers and our children and all make gingerbread cookies together. We mix, decorate and eat the cookies, all with the ample help of the children, and there are usually enough adults to get to the cleaning up and the children's sugar-highs as well. This is another great opportunity to sing! You can spend the afternoon (something I just did today!) baking and icing and eating and singing and running the children around outside. Another thing you could do is make gingerbread houses - probably better with considerably fewer people - and decorate those. There are many kits for sale, but they are not impossible to make from scratch too, quite like gingerbread people, or you can just use graham crackers.
There are many alcoholic ways to enjoy the holidays, but I won't go into those much, as I am quite unfamiliar with most of them. One thing that can be fun though is to try making mulled mead or wine. Another version without the alcohol is to make Christmas cheer, a beverage made with apple and lemon juices, sometimes other juices and your spices of choice: cinnamon, cloves, allspice, ginger, star anise, etc.. It is a great thing to make for friends and family; especially those with young children, or if you are going visiting and want to bring something along.
Food can also make terrific gifts (think homemade jam, jelly, and cheese or chocolate truffles or other sweets - not so much the proverbial fruitcake), but the most significant it can be as a gift is to someone who needs it. Make a big pot of soup or even Christmas cheer and bring it to a community association such as a food bank or shelter (call ahead first to make sure its alright) and pass it out. Or even just make a bit of extra soup (or something else that's freezable) when you have it for dinner so you have some to freeze and bring to a neighbor, a friend who has an injury or a new baby, or perhaps an elderly friend, neighbor or family member. Even just participating however you can in your local food bank's food drive makes a difference to someone.
Having dinners, brunches and lunches with family and friends during the holidays is already popular, but is also quite significant. There is something very special about sharing a meal with someone, even more so with someone you love and/or see infrequently. It can be a time for really spending time talking and laughing and catching up together, and children particularly notice when a meal has that leisurely and celebratory feel that is easier to muster up in the holidays. If everyone shares the preparation and the clean up it can give you more time to enjoy each other's company and also lightens the load on the hosts.
5. The tree....
Three years ago we went to our local nursery and bought a living pine tree and kept growing it in a very large pot. This is technically 'buying', but I reckon buying well - that has been our Christmas tree every year for three years. Each year it has gotten bigger and has required some care (regular watering in the summer, adequate light, re-potting, etc.), but each year we have enjoyed it as our tree as well: inside for ten days during the holidays and outside the rest of the year. Now, that tree cost us as much as a very nice large cut tree....but only once! This is our fourth year with it, and I think it will outgrow our living room next year, so it will probably be our last. Early next spring we will find a spot in our yard (or friend or neighbor's) or at the park down the street and plant it, where we can visit it or at least see it growing. Then when its holiday time next year we will select another tree to keep us company for a few years and it will enjoy the same fate. There is a Christmas Tree Care sheet you can download for more information on the care of a potted conifer (just scroll down the page a bit). I find that doing it this way removes us from the 'plastic or live cut tree' environmental debate. Our tree doesn't hurt the environment, it enhances it.
Another way that some of us here on the Northwest coast can have a 'tree' is to use the blown down branches of the endemic conifers when there is a storm. We get some impressive wind storms here, and there are usually many branches (or even whole trees) to choose from.
Enjoy and Happy Holidays to all!
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